[Note from Danielle Before the Note from Dad: OK… my dad (and mom) has been asking for a while that I post this.  Usually the only things I would actually say about myself are self-deprecating and comical, but my dad wanted to use the blog as a forum to solicit a writing job (and from some of the stuff he wrote, he may be trying to take the “If I can’t get her a job, I might as well try to get her married off” route) despite the fact that I often refer to my procrastination, excessive drinking, and flagrant disregard for the law and social norms.  I think he did a good job balancing the compliments with humorous counterparts to make me more comfortable though… but I still feel a little weird.  In the interest of making my dad smile, and possibly you, I present, in a completely unedited form, “A Plea From My Dad.”]

Hire My Daughter… Please

Caveat: This blog entry is from Danielle’s Dad.  It does not necessarily express the views of the owner of GirlvWorld.com and should be an op-ed piece allowed in the interest of freedom of the press, daughterly love, and the proximity to Christmas and the hope of bountiful gifts from the parental units this year.

Hire my daughter… please.  For a writing gig.

As this is her umpteenth year of professional studentry, she is obviously well-educated and actually makes very good grades.
Writing from the unique perspective of her father, I am probably better acquainted with her virtues than her vices, although some of the stories from this blog have been eye-openers better left undiscussed.  However, for those of you not personally acquainted with the Girl of GirlvWorld.com fame, let me list a few of her pros and cons:

1) Pro- Very smart (when examined from the viewpoint of a parent or potential employer)
2) Con- Very smart (when examined from the viewpoint of a potential suitor.  If you’re looking for a dumb blonde, keep looking.)
3) Pro- Very independent and self-sufficient
4) Con- Except for bugs in the house, remembering to fill her gas tank, changing the oil, etc.
5) Pro- Very funny with a well-developed sense of humor.
6) Con- Doesn’t mind using it to devastate those that incur her wrath.
7) Pro- Likes sports. Particularly the New Orleans Saints (Who Dat?)
8) Con- Likes the post-Favre Packers and thinks Aaron Rodgers is the QB of the future.
9) Pro- Realized the excellence of the Saints when they steamrolled the Packers last season.
10) Con- Refused to deliver the message to Aaron Rodgers, “Jason David says hi,” after he was intercepted a zillion times when the Saints steamrolled the Packers last season.
11) Pro- Is not a Cowboys fan despite living in Texas most of her life(and for the record, it’s easy to be a fan of the ‘Boys .  Try being a fan of a team that wins one game a year).
12) Pro- Beautiful (from the perspective of a suitor)
13) Con- Beautiful (from the perspective of a dad who is quite certain none of her potential suitors are good enough for her.  And yes, I know places to hide a body!).
14) Pro- Excellent writer, humorous, insightful, and a hard-worker.
15) Con- Doesn’t realize she is an excellent writer and hides her “light under a bushel basket” instead of letting it shine.
16) Pro- Loves Waffle House, the people who work there and the people who eat there.
17) Con- Needs a writing job so she can eat there more often.
18) Pro- Well-traveled.  How many girls do you know who have surfed the North Shore of Hawaii, starved their way across Europe, been nearly attacked by crocodiles in Australia, all while being scared of the dark?  (Once again, Danielle, your grandfather was kidding about monsters in the closet)
19) Pro- Now has biting wit, mad writing skills, and Tina Fey glasses.
20) Con- Still believes UT is the ultimate educational institution.
21) Pro- Can quote extensively from “Back to the Beach”, “Rock n Roll High School”, and “Spinal Tap.”
22) Con- Often has to explain what she means to her peers when she quotes from “Back to the Beach”, “Rock n Roll High School”, and “Spinal Tap.”
23) PRO- (And this is a big one) If she gets a high-paying writing job, she promised to provide for her parents.
For all the reasons above, anyone reading this blog should hire my daughter to write for them.

Sincerely,
Danielle’s Dad

P.S. As long as I have the floor, I should mention to her friends that Danielle’s little brothers are not treated better than her and she was never beaten nor deprived.  What she refers to as “neglected” others would call “spoiled rotten.”

Sincerely Again,
Danielle’s Dad